My Fairy Tale Adventure Begins!

Ehm....

Eeerrr....

Well....

Okay.

I am married.

There, I said it.

And the truth is, I am very happy with that. It is actually kind of a surprise for me too. Well, you know how my perception towards marriage is. But it all changes when I met him.

This might sounds cheesy, but he really is the perfect man for me. I couldn’t find anyone else better suited me and my way of life than him. Truthfully, we were also can’t believe it at first, of how much we are so perfect for each other. How good our little life together is. That’s when we decided to get married.

And oh how it brings pain and headache. I am gonna tell you the truth : I hate preparing wedding! It was all just a big fucking headache, with a lot of planning, choosing, and deciding. Hellooo...deciding to get married is already a big thing for me, and you are asking me to decide a lot more? Well, not that I have decision issues, but I mean, I am not that kind of girl who always have a dream wedding since they were little. I was like, yeah whatever, as long as I am married to the man I love, whom I choose by myself and I wasn’t pressured by anyone to marry him.

And if I can decide anything about my wedding other than the guy I am marrying, I want a small wedding with families and close friends only. But since my parents were TOTALLY against it *roll-eyes*, the more reason not to care so much of my own wedding.

And then we got married.

I am gonna spare you all the gory details of our wedding. In sum, it was scary. No...no...no...not that we were scared about spending the rest of our life together. It was the amount of attention given to us. How they are going to see everything we do, hear everything we were saying. And I was just scared that I am not gonna give a good performance. What if I ruin this? What if I can’t remember the vow? What if I sneeze too much? What if I cried like a sick fuck? Well, that sort of stuff.

Anyway, its been a month now that we are married. Honestly, not much has change since. We were kinda already living like this since a year ago. The only difference is not we got to really doing all the future plans we made. And that is exciting.

But ever since we got married, I often find myself deep-staring at my husband with an astonished feeling. I still can’t believe how lucky I am to have someone like him. He’s everything I need in a man. I love everything about him.

I love the way he smile at me. I love the way he always make crazy face and voice. I love how he always listen to me, and actually considering my opinions that I gave him. I love that he understand me, and always supporting my every plans. I love that I can share everything with him, knowing that we can discuss everything and find a way out for every problem. I love that we always talk. I love that we make future plans, and actually pouring every effort we have to reach that goal. I love the way he make love to me. I love that he is crazily in love with me, like I am to him.

Yes, I have a perfect life with a perfect husband. Sounds like fairy tale now. I never expect life can be this good. Sometimes we even think that this is too good to be true. That later some horrible thing will come our way and ruin everything, which require us to work our ass off to solve every problem we have in order to stay together.

Well, I think we need to relax and just enjoy what we have now. Worry later!

Yes, Love is Blind...and I Love You

One said that love is blind.

Hey, do you suppose to see the other thing than love when you are in love? Bukankah itu artinya mengingkari cinta itu sendiri? When you are in love, you only think about the love, not other things. Cinta itu dari hati loh. Bukan cinta namanya jika kau sudah mencampuradukkan logika dan otak saat mencintai seseorang. Cinta jadi tak tulus jika demikian.

Cinta itu id. Nafsu menggebu yang jika tak diawasi oleh otak sebagai superego, akan merajalela mengisi segenap ruang jiwa dengan keinginan-keinginan yang kadang absurd. Dimana logikanya jika ada keinginan yang sedemikian besar untuk memberikan segala yang dimiliki untuk seseorang yang dicinta? Kerelaan untuk melakukan sesuatu, berkorban, ataupun memaafkan. Bahkan ketika hal-hal tersebut seenaknya menyelonong garis batas ideal yang dengan rapi kita canangkan sebelumnya.

Yes, love is indeed blind.

Memang benar, jika kamu membiarkan sang id bekerja tanpa awasan si superego, suatu saat kamu pasti akan terjerembab dalam kubangan cinta itu sendiri. Membuatmu mengeluh dan menggaruk dada karena gatalnya cinta menyerang hati.

But, what the hell? Don’t you see that love is fun? Being in love is magnificent. Loving someone is definitely not something that I regret.

Ah, seandainya kamu bisa merasakan yang aku rasakan. Memandangi wajahnya yang tertidur pulas, menikmati senyumnya, sensasi saat lengannya melingkari pundakmu, atau ketika jari jemarinya menggenggam erat jemarimu. Mengingatnya saja membuat aku tenggelam dalam kebahagiaan.

And I wouldn’t trade that for everything.

Ya, aku mencintaimu hei lelakiku. Tidak peduli seberapa parah kamu menggores hatiku. And I don’t care what you feel or think about it. I really don’t. Kamu tak punya kuasa mengubah perasaan yang kumiliki terhadapmu. Pokoknya kamu tidak bisa menghentikanku untuk tetap mencintaimu.

Jangan khawatir, jika nanti aku menangis, aku akan terlebih dahulu menyiapkan segabrek tissue untuk menghapus si mata tukang mencret itu. Akan kuperas dia habis-habisan, kukeringkan persediaannya, lantas mengompresnya baik-baik. Hingga esok hari aku bisa kembali mencintaimu. Dan kamu nggak boleh protes. Wek! *ppfffttt